So, I put it out there on A Questionable Method’s Facebook page (here) that I was going to attempt to write a post a week. Probably. Well, maybe.
This is more for me than you. It was another one of those well-intentioned New Year’s Resolutions, and being that it’s almost April I figured it may be time to try and accomplish at least one thing on my list.
Get fitter Eat better Be nicer Stop binge watching Netflix
So here goes. A post a week about….. well, we’ll see what comes up.
I have just come back from our annual visit to Australia. Before you roll your eyes and think I’m an over-privileged wanker for saying that so casually, we are #blessed (not even sorry that I just hashtagged that) to have our flights and accommodation paid for by my family who live there. THAT’S how much they want to see me. (Insert comical emoji with somewhat self-deprecating-surprised-that-people-want-to-see-me face )
Usually we do
catastrophic amounts a bit of shopping while we are over there as the outlet shops are in delightful abundance. This year I was on a mission to find acceptable ‘mum-clothes’.
Let me backtrack a little.
A couple of weeks before we left, I was sitting in the car with my 18 year old daughter having a conversation about the way I dress. It started out fine. Jokey even. Until I realised she was really serious and my clothing choices were sometimes bothering her.
Just to clear things up, it’s not like I’m wearing tiny mini skirts and leopard print body suits (okay, well not leopard print body suits). She informed me that the stuff I own is the stuff her friends own, and that it would be nice when we went out together if people knew I was the older one.
*Mentally huffs on back of nails and rubs them on shoulder*
After making a concerted effort to stop grinning I started to become a little peeved. (What a great word. ‘Peeved” people should used that word more) I was all “But that’s what’s in the shops!!” and she was all “find other shops!!” and I was all “WHAT F*CKING SHOPS?!” and she was all “ONES THAT ARE DIFFERENT TO WHAT THE YEAR 13 GIRLS SHOP AT”
As you can imagine this continued on, tones of voices raising each time I suggested a store I thought would be ‘age appropriate’. As it turns out everything is targeted at 18 year olds. How convenient. So then I was all “So, am I supposed to shop at Miller’s?? Am I meant to start wearing baggy mum jeans and forest green knitwear?!” and she pretty much stopped talking.
It’s highly possible this was all about something far deeper. Like the fact that I am a young mum, and sometimes she just wants a not-young-mum. Which then makes me feel all the guilt, and leads me to start questioning whether it was wrong of me to bust out my take on crumping in front of her mates.
Or maybe she just had a really shit bout of PMS.
Either way I like to try and take my kid’s feelings into consideration, so I just started sending her Snapchats of randoms whose outfits I liked. She would then send me back a photo of her face, representing her opinion. It was like a test. Like a test where you realise you have completely misunderstood everything the teacher was saying (ie, all.of.highschool).
Eventually I ‘got it right’ so I had something to work with while navigating the shops in Australia. I was set. I had a fashion plan. I would finally look like a stylish-but-age-appropriate mum.
Then I pretty much spent all my money on active wear, because god-help-me if I can’t work from home in Lycra and sports bras.
So that was a win.
I get it though. I look young. I get I.Ded. I enjoy memes. I occasionally dab when I probably shouldn’t. I know that she just wants people to be able to identify the parent in social situations. So I can at least try to refrain from squealing “TWINSIES” and pointing at our matching outfits when she meets me for coffee.
But I will never shop at Miller’s.