There’s a spider carcass in my car.

So here’s my week in review. You know, because you have been desperate to read about that. *hahaha* After the last post   I started thinking about my attitude towards car trips, and how they really are a nice way to spend time with J (sans kids, because you read the bit about inappropriate adult behaviours…

Morning Glory

Don’t worry, I’m not oversharing. It was NOT that kind of morning. For some magical reason we all slept in a little today.  I was up late last night having heart palpitations because an interview I had given with the glorious Millie Elder-Holmes had been posted on her blog (here)  and I realised that people might actually read…

Two girls walk into a pub 

I am committing sleep hygiene crime here. I’m writing this post on my phone, lying on my side, illuminated only by the auto brightness setting. I should’ve just had the warm milk… I may as well write this post in reverse chronological order (because that’s how my brain functions at this time.) It’s 2.50am and…

Silent night.

I usually write a post about Christmas at this time. It’s usually not really about the joy and the gratitude, but rather the stress and the hostility. But I’m not going to do that this year. This year is going to be different. This year, I plan to be zen as f*ck. How have I…

99 bottles of beer on the wall….

One evening after dinner, but before all the kids were down for the night, James and I had a beer. Okay, a bourbon and coke. Okay two. We sat there, and smiled at each other. James looked at his drink, then at me, then at the room where the kids were hanging out. “Wouldn’t parenting…

No really, I’m totally qualified..

Well that was a Debbie Downer. Let’s be honest though, I knew it would say this. I’m pretty sure I’ve talked about impostor syndrome in an earlier post but I can’t be bothered doing that thing where I look through all my old posts, become distracted by how crap they are, spend 4 hours trying to…

How to adult (and other fantasies)

All I wanted to be when I was young was a grown-up. It looked like they were having a fundamentally better time. Despite proving myself academically in my latter years, high school and I never had much of a romantic relationship. I had a theory:  math and science classes were designed to melt my brain…

Dirty Expectations.

I imagine it was probably 1988. We were about 7 or 8 at the time. There was a movie that played on television, and all the kids were talking about it. Ok, the girls were. Ok, one of them was. She was the rebel kid who I was part scared of, and part in awe…

The Orange Shirt of Adulthood.

I have a pretty good arse. It’s okay to say it. And, if that sentence makes you uncomfortable, here is a picture of a puppy. You can just stare at that while I keep writing. As a teenager (like, the short time before I went full motherhood) I liked to wear an assortment of clothing…

You are doing great. Please pass the mashed potato.

Do you know which words I can never hear enough of? “Well done, excellent job.” Those 4 words serve as a warm blanket wrapped around me on a crapper of a day. Maybe it’s that those words soothe my oft-depleted ego. Maybe it’s that I have a fear of letting people down, and so hearing…

My Cup Over-Flowth

I burned a pair of undies today. Like a Sophie Ellis-Bextor song, it was  murder on the dance floor. If the floor was actually the crotch of a Victoria’s  Secret, Union-Jack-emblazoned thong.  Heartbreaking. I must say, still getting your period at age 34 when you are well over the the idea of ever having more kids…

Ouch – social media and yoga dreams

I keep waking up and immediately having pains in my back and neck. I wish I could say that this is due to the epic workouts I have been so busy with that have ensured I have no time to dedicate my words and thoughts to this blog, but unfortunately  this is not even remotely accurate….